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Amazing Possibilities!

Writer's pictureMatthew Kelly

You Have a GOD-SIZE Hole in Your Heart: What Are You Filling It With?


I got three little kids now and I got Walter, he's about three and a half. And I got Isabelle, she's two. And then my wife and I, we've got a newborn little boy, baby Harry, three months old. And it's amazing, kids, they just teach us so much. But I remember when my son was about 18 months old, my wife was putting him to bed one night and I was sitting in the kitchen. We've got one of those monitors so we can see him and we can hear him. And she was putting him to bed and she read his story to him. And then she did his prayers with him. And then she put him in his crib and tucked him in and kissed him goodnight. And just as she was leaving, she got to the door, I'm sitting in the kitchen and I see my little boy say to Maggie, "Mommy, I have something to tell you." Of course, my wife turns around and Asked him what he has to tell her. And he said, "Mommy, I'm a very happy boy."

I'm sitting there like, dude, you're 18 months old. You don't know what you're talking about. But here's the thing, right, he does. He does. You're like, open the catechism, chapter 1, point 1. Well, it turns out to be point 27 because there's 26 preamble points, but the first point of the first chapter of the catechism, what does it say is, "God created a man for happiness."


How's that working out? God created a man for happiness. And we have this desire within us for that happiness. And very often we ignore it, right, or we try to satisfy that desire for happiness with the wrong things. Few weeks later, I came home and for about two or three weeks, Walter, every time I asked him, "How are you, Walter?" He said, "I'm a very happy boy, daddy." Well, about three weeks later, I come home one night and I walk into the kitchen and Walter's in his high chair having his dinner. And Isabelle's in her high chair next to him having her dinner. And I say to Walter, "How's my very happy boy today?" He looks at me in a very serious face. "No, daddy." I say, "What do you mean no, daddy?" He said, "I'm a sad boy right now." I said to my wife, what did you do to my son? No, she would punt me. Absolutely drop-kick me from here to next week. I said to my wife, what happened? What happened?


So in the Kelly household, nap time is from two o'clock to five o'clock every day. There are no exceptions to the rule, ever. Okay? Nap time from two o'clock to five o'clock every day. If the kids want to just lay in their bed and rest, that's fine. Very often, Walter will say to me, "Daddy, I don't need a nap. I'm a big boy." Okay, buddy. You just lay down in your bed and rest. Okay? Three minutes later, gone, completely out.

Anyway, this afternoon, Walter decided he wasn't going to take his nap. He's going to walk around his crib. He's going to do a standup show for his stuffed animals. He's building caves with his blankets. So come 6:30, guess what? He's tired. And what does he equate that with? Unhappiness. Here's the thing. God created us for happiness. And you know what? Our happiness is a fragile thing. Our happiness is a very fragile thing. That's why God calls us to a narrow path, not the broad highway, because God realizes, you know what, I created you for your happiness and your happiness is a fragile thing, much, much, much, much, much, much more fragile than we realize. And you have this desire for happiness and God wants you to start listening to it.

Because this is what I know for sure. I know this for absolute sure, every single one of us, we have a hole within us. We have a hole. From time to time, we feel empty, we feel incomplete, we feel unfulfilled, we feel dissatisfied. Why? Because we got a hole in us and we try to fill that hole with lots of things. Try to fill that hole with lots of things, all sorts of stuff we try to fill that hole with. We say, oh, I feel a bit empty. I'll throw some accomplishment in the hole. Oh, I throw a bigger accomplishment in the hole, we think, oh, I still feel a little bit dissatisfied. Maybe I need a bigger accomplishment. I'll throw a bigger accomplishment in the hole and see what that does. But it doesn't feel the hole. Then we think, oh what about some pleasures? Maybe I'll throw some pleasures in the hole. Maybe that'll feel the hole, but that never works either.


We think, maybe stuff will fill the hole. Maybe if I get the right car and the right house and the right clothes, maybe that'll fill the hole. Maybe money. Maybe if I had more money or enough money, that'll fill the hole. But nothing fills the hole. Why? Because each and every single one of us, we have a God-sized hole. Only God's big enough to fill the hole. And until we invite God and say, all right, God, I got this big hole in me and only you are big enough God to fill this God-sized hole, please come and fill me up, come and fill that hole in my life. That takes surrender, doesn't it? It takes humility.


Matthew Kelly


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