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Amazing Possibilities!

Writer's pictureMatthew Kelly

The Seven Levels of Intimacy


The seven levels of intimacy is a model designed to provide insight into the ways we relate with different people. If your relationship with your friendly barista is confined to the first three levels of intimacy, that’s fine. But if your marriage is confined to the first three levels, you’ve got a problem.



The seven levels of intimacy are:


1. Cliches


2. Facts


3. Opinions


4. Hopes and Dreams


5. Feelings


6. Fears, Faults, and Failures


7. Legitimate Needs


Intimacy is the one thing a person cannot live happily without. We can live happily without new cars, designer clothes, dream homes, exotic vacations—but we cannot live happily without intimacy. You can survive without intimacy, but you cannot thrive without it.


Matthew Kelly


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